Melinda Schroeder
10/10/2014
English Comp 101
Show vs Tell
As i get into the car, I know the 90 min. drive will be well worth it. The freeway is long, straight and flat. The biggest hills are constructed of solid concrete we call overpasses. The temperature is a frigid mid 50's due to the a/c fan blowing on full blast. I can't help being full of excitement even know i will have to get out of my icebox on wheels and into the blistering 98 degree sun once i get there.
After my long drive I arrive at my much anticipated destination. I see cars as far as the eye can see. I can tell I wasn't the only one with this idea today. I finally find a parking spot about a good 30 min. walk to my paradise
I step outside into the inferno. It instantly takes my breath away. The strong smell of saltwater and the sounds of crashing waves quickly push aside the discomfort the heat brings. Arms full of today's necessity, I quickly follow a trail that leads to a day filled by fun in the sun. Due to the rolling dunes blocking my sight, I use the kites battling the seagulls for a spot in the great blue sky to guide my way.
Finally I step onto the sand, hot as it may be my feet welcomes it's softness. It leaves footprints with every step. Its then the roar of the waves gives way to the sounds of kids laughter as they run and play. People are everywhere. They smells of suntan oil and surf board wax are a welcome smell compared to the sour smell of the car exhaust from the city. As I look around, I see the joy on peoples faces. I only wish this would last forever. As the day comes to a close I regretfully make my way back to my car for my trip back to the concrete jungle. Where life is back to being ever so real.
"Finally I step onto the sand, hot as it may be my feet welcomes it's softness."
ReplyDeleteVery clever choice of words. I love when people give inanimate objects emotions because everyone can related to “welcoming” which directly translates into warming. One of my favorite lines from your entry for sure.
In second place was, “stepping outside into the inferno”. I certainly know that feeling and I think it was a solid word choice. Everyone knows the feeling of stepping from a vehicle and you leave the cold air to the shock difference of the heat outside.
Enjoyable read.
I also liked the description about the "kites battling the seagulls" description. What a short description, but vivid in details that really evoke the reader to this place. Good work.
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